The Fine Line Between Acceptable and Nasty
September 26th, 2006 by Jeff Simmermon
Everyone know that food doesn’t belong in the bathroom. Just putting an air freshener that smells faux-edible in there is repulsive, and bringing an actual sandwich in — or a chicken leg — forget about it. Ugh. I’m a single dude that lives alone, right, but some lines I do NOT cross.
But what about this? What if you were chewing on something and then walked in there? I was at work today and was walking down the hall to a meeting and chewing a carrot stick up and thought “Better tend to this before the meeting,” then next thing I know I’m in the bathroom, chewing something.
What’s that about? Do you spit it out? I wanted to, but did not.
Answers, people. I’m unsettled.
Filed under Jeff Simmermon having 5 Comments »
September 26th, 2006 at 11:00 pm
My boyfriend’s sister-in-law once observed her husband walking into their bathroom with the wireless laptop, a beer and a hunk of cheese.
Not sure if that helps but maybe it’s like a zen koan and if you reread it enough the answer will emerge.
September 27th, 2006 at 5:26 am
yes..it must be either swallowed immediately..or tossed…
xoxo
September 27th, 2006 at 6:52 am
as long as your mouth remained closed, i think you’re good. of course, your toothbrush lives in the bathroom, so if you wanna get unsettled by something, that should do the trick.
-steve
September 27th, 2006 at 7:02 am
aw, come on… there’s something almost poetic about eating and shitting at the same time. *cue Lion King score* …”it’s the cirrrcle of liiiiife… and it moooves us allllll…”
September 27th, 2006 at 1:13 pm
You spit that shit all over the inside of the urinal and leave a confusing mess for the next person who uses it.