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The Art of the Ad-Hoc Consumer Review

July 8th, 2010 by D.Billy

Look – when we go into a place of business, sometimes things just happen, that’s all. Whether it’s a coffee shop or a fried chicken joint, events have conspired to provide us with some experiences that we have been moved to share with you, our lovely readers. Experiences that many of you have then chosen to share with others in turn. The internet is a bigger, crazier, more tricked-out vehicle for sharing consumer feedback than Al Gore could ever have imagined back when he invented it, and the right (or wrong) kind review on the web can conceivably launch a place or shut it right down.

But while some of us run to Yelp to post a review and tell all of the other consumerist nerds to check this place out or stay the hell away from that place, some folks still like to keep it analog. And I respect that. Here are a few ad-hoc, word-on-the-street* “reviews” that I’ve personally stumbled across:

*Clearly, the word is not the only thing on the street. This was one block away from the Dallas BBQ… and if that substance on the paper is what I think it is… well, that had to be some mighty fast Sharpie work to draft part A of the review before part B asserted itself. To me, this is almost like a quick & dirty sort of voodoo ceremony.

Okay, I’ll admit it – this one was me. But there was no ketchup or mustard on the table, so I couldn’t get quite this raw about it.

But hey, it’s not ALL bad…

See? If you ducked into this restroom in New Haven, Connecticut to take care of your bizness and happened to be in the market for some cheap particle board furniture but didn’t know where to go, POW! There it is.

And, in a more generalized sort of public evalution, while IKEA may rule that bathroom stall…

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